uselessness.

as she sits at the same dinning table
as this man eating his breakfast.

the same man that taught her to read her name.
... and her first 50 Chinese characters.
the same man that got into a car accident picking her up.
the same man that just months ago,
... barely comprehensible, barely coherent
... reading with the help of a magnifying glass and thick glasses,
... flipping the thin pages with trembling, shaky hands,
... still trying to teach her "lun yu" (Analects of Confucious)
the same man that she flew 1500km to spend a weekend with
... originally hoping to celebrate his 85th.

... as she sits there watching.
they are silent.
... as she watches him fall asleep eating breakfast.
she can't think of anything to say.
... as he wakes up, and continues to eat
she struggles to formulate a sentence in her mind.

so she sits in silence.
and watch this man eat breakfast.
with all the love... and all the helplessness
of a favourite granddaughter
... hoping... against all hope.
that thru his glassy eyes.... despite multiple heart failures...
he does see her. happy. to see her
that he knows she's there. and can still feel her love.